Rants for a frustrated wife

When most wives find out that My husband has been in Japan for 20 mths, have missed the the birth of both our kids and been on work ups or deployments they ask me how do you handle it.  Well truth be known I do not know. All I know is my kids need me.  I get up I go about my day.  If we are lucky we get to talk to daddy when we wake via skype. It has helped a lot.  I notice that the day goes more smoothly when we talk.  The time difference makes it more difficult for us to talk.  Since when we wake up daddy is going to sleep or already passed out.  Right now tho my biggest issue is that in Aug will be two years.  Since he left. But we have no orders as of yet.  It worries me.  Keeps me up at night.  When my three year old daughter ask me when daddy is coming home I have to say I don't know or soon baby.  If only we had a relative date on where and when we could be together again.  I try to keep my head up and I try not to scream cry and curse,  but sometimes it is hard.  Sometimes I feel I  have a few screws lose even threw all the Marines have put us threw I love the Marine Corps. I respect the men and women who serve our great country. That being said I do not like the unknown and yes I know that life speically with the military is a great unknown, But I would really like to know what to tell my kids when they ask when daddy is coming home.  Or my family that ask me at least 3 times a week.  With a deployment I kinda knew.  I had a support system with the unit.  Other wives that are going threw the same thing.  As of now I know nothing.  Have no one to commiserate with.  It's hard.  I keep going for my kids and my husband.  I keep sane in the fact that my husband loves me and wishes he was not there.  I miss him.  I tell him that all the time.  It doesn't seem to encompass all the feeling I have.  I don't only miss him, I long for him to be here, to share in the joys and the trials.  To watch our kids grow. To be able to look at him while I am around the house.  To talk to him threw out the day.  To feel his arms around me at night. But as always, I keep my head up and I pray for him to come home. 

-Semper Fi
Aimee

P.S. Dear Monitor where are our Orders.